P(urple)C(irclejerk)

[headmt]

one of you get me a shitpost

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week 0, monday night

[liuli]

[ hello yes, there is a voice calling from the front area of the studio apartment late on monday night ]

Have either of you tried these 'white cl*w's?' They're terrible.


[ who let him in here ]

[headmt]

[Sadly, probably Molly. He just leaves the door open all the time.]

They're awful! Do you want one?

[aubins]

[ molly shut the door challenge. still, yuri doesn’t seem perturbed by the intrusion. ]

That sounds like a solid endorsement if I ever heard one. And I feel like this isn’t the first time I’ve said that today... [ hm ]

[liuli]

I've got a delicate palate - I'll have to pass.

[

unsure. ] Who's endorsing who, now? You're both quite aware your door was open, yes?

[headmt]

[Going to go digging for one! Stop enjoying awful things just because they're terrible challenge. And then coming out to sit on the floor in the little living area.]

Hm? Oh. It's fine. I know where all my stuff is. I can tell if anyone messes with it.

[aubins]

[ well. that’s news to him. ]

Was it?

[ hm. ] It’s not like I have anything worth taking myself.

[liuli]

And here I thought you were just inviting my company.

[ but, valid. he feels the same! no white claw for gu yun, but he ambles over to go join molly, kicking off his boots like a good boy and not a heathen and dropping down. ] Speaking of, I've learned of a terrible substance, Molly - well, rather, the both of us did. Look, I can do a magic trick.

[ ahem. as he settles, with a flourish, he closes his eyes! all drama... and then starts thinking about manifesting ziliujin...

and

there it is.

a large four by four grid of bright purple jello shots. ]

Ta-da.

week 0, friday post body

[aubins]

[ what's up sluts. it's post body announcement, yuri is here and he has a bottle of pre-mixed peach bellini in one hand and a frown on his face.

he just walks in and drops himself down on the loft bedroom couch. ]

...

So. Raise your hands if you were sort of expecting something like this to happen at some point, but maybe not this soon.

[headmt]

[just


raising his hand]

[liuli]

[ gu yun's sitting on the floor. he's got his phone in his hand, and every now and then checks the screen, though he raises his hand.

there are no falling cherry blossoms! however, there are lots of pink cherry blossom petals on his person. there are some in his hair, some on his shoulders, he's got a little pile of them in his lap, too. it seems he's given up trying to bat them away, because who knows where they're coming from, and when he does, they just. come back? it's fine. ]

[aubins]

Assuming it was intentional, there's always going to be someone out there who gets their kicks out of this kind of stuff.

[ he's opening the bottle of bellini and taking a sip. then he's just going to wordlessly hand it to molly. ]


[ he does not ask about the cherry blossoms. don't push him over the edge with your cherry blossoms young gun. ]

[headmt]

[Taking a sip. And then like. A long drink.]

What's with the-- [Gestures.] Are you summoning something?

[liuli]

[ he. sighs. ]

I got locked in the simulation room last night when the doors closed with a few others. It stopped working, and when we woke up, it was like this. You all can't see them falling, right? Just on me?

[ fuckin MAGIC ]

W1 - WED

[headmt]

[hey good morning sluts

I don't even know what time this is set at. It's probably like. Fucking noon by now. Oh well?

Molly is just exiting his room with a stretch, arms over the head, like just barely friggin' dressed. Because he is a terrible roommate. He's found like a robe that is basically nothing and haphazardly tied it just as much as is required for him not to be yelled at. Immediately just shouting up at the loft.]

Yuri! I want breakfast! Yuri? Are you here? How much can I pay you to go get me breakfast?

[aubins]

[ hello yuri would like to trade his roommate for someone quieter and less likely to yell at him for breakfast. ]

1,000 gold with an extra 100 gold added for everything past two slices of toast and a coffee.

[ he's here, and he's... awake and also actually dressed so he's doing a little better than molly is right now apparently. ]

[liuli]

[ there is a mysterious voice, calling just loud enough to be heard from an unidentified location......... ]

You don't have any money, so you better start to pay in favors.

[ ??? ]

[headmt]

[This is dressed? He's dressed. He'd go out like this.]

Fuck you! Who says I don't have money? I'll take four slices of toast, two eggs, a fruit platter, and some bacon.

[aubins]

[ a functional disaster is what he is. hang on, yuri's just going to lean out from the loft to squint around the room. ]

...

[ where is gu yun is a game like where's waldo/wally but infinitely more twinkis--- actually i typed that, then remembered what wally looks like so maybe this joke doesn't work. anyway.

this is just their life now, so surprise!gu yun is allowed to be mysterious for the moment. ]

I'm charging for each individual piece of fruit on that platter too.

[liuli]

I'll eat dirt before I pay you for a thing.

[ mysterious? and slightly louder this time, like the owner of this clearly mysterious voice is moving around. where's steampunk waldo indeed. yuri may hear someone yawn, though, and then muffle it a second later. ]

What kind of strange breakfast is that, even... Tea sounds nice, if you're at it, though.

week 3, wednesday

[aubins]

[ it's wednesday my duuuuuddddeeesssss.

yuri is just sat on his sofa with a copy of one of his terrible smutty books from the library, reading it and laughing. seriously, who writes these. ]

[headmt]

[Just.

Snatching the book out of his hands.]

Is there a reason you keep reading these? What is the point. Feels like a despair exercise.

[liuli]

Yuri, if you're worried about your intimacy skills, I'd recommend avoiding bad erotica. What's this one about?

[ he's standing on his tiptoes to get a look at the cover of the book.

also hi gu yun's here again what else is new. happy wednesday don't order anyone around.]

[aubins]

[ gu yun your rent ]

Oh, no. The best part? Worst part? Is that there are sequels.

[ ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE. it's the second book. ]

And hey, I've never had any complaints.

[headmt]

If I have to have any more conversations about books, I'm leaving the room.

[He's had a long day? He almost drowned earlier?]

[liuli]

[ he makes a little "tsk" noise that is definitely teasing. aw, poor baby. ]

We could read it aloud, I'm sure it'd be an equally horrible play. [ but also: no. ]