[ hmmm. there's a pause while he apparently sorts through all the sordid and exciting tales of his life... or puts together an appropriate lie, who can say? ]
One of my... friends, I guess you could call her. She's a bit literal minded. Or just dense, depending on the time of day you ask me.
She went to the trouble of creating a spell from scratch to make boots taste like liquorice, just because I told her if she wanted a chance in hell of restoring her household back to nobility she should consider tonguing a few noble's boots in the process.
gu yun listens to yuri's tale, as he goes, thoughtfully, and then waves the hand holding the sharpie. ]
I'm charmed by the insult, and I don't know a damned thing about magic, so I'll say it's true. Am I the only person in this entire place who thought magic was just a fairy tale? I'm starting to get self conscious.
You'd be surprised. Maybe you're just not talking to the right non-believers.
[ mm hmm hmmmmmmmm. ]
Constance is a very special lady. And yes, she did go to all the trouble of inventing completely new magic because she can't tell when someone's making fun of her.
What bullying. [ is he talking about yuri or molly? who knows. is he serious? who knows.
hmmm. gu yun's turn. he tilts his head, once, twice, thoughtful. let's see... ]
Not long before I came here, I was seeing to my post at the Western border of Great Liang, the Jade Gate, when word reached me that a bald, mute, and utterly rancid smelling monk took my ward and two of his friends away from the Marquis's manor in the capital. It seemed this villain wanted to spirit them away to Jiangnan, a city by the sea, for who knows what sort of nefarious reason.
Naturally, I wouldn't stand for it, so I left my post to my second in command, donned an Iron Eagle and flew the entire way across the country, from the border city to Jiangnan, a journey that should have taken a week, in three days, to ensure the monk's devious schemes wouldn't come to fruition.
Hah! Alright, got me again, then. I’m terrible at my own game, it seems.
[Knocking it back without much more complaint than that, though. He is. Absolutely starting to feel it now though, because he’d had (looks at fingers) 5? That’s probably fine, he got a high tolerance.]
Okay, my turn again.
When I was younger, I was kidnapped by a cult. I wandered a little too far from the troupe by myself and got a little too drunk at the wrong tavern, and when I woke up, they had dragged me away into the night. My blood has special properties, you see, that they’d use to commune with their god. Tiamat, the queen of dragons, but don’t say her name too loudly, alright? Lots of heads means lots of ears. They bled me, over and over. Never enough to kill me, mind, I was too valuable. Eventually I escaped when someone accidentally left a door open, and I was brave enough to make a break for it. Took me months to reunite with the Carnival, huge pain, honestly.
I really would've. [ he looks. not bothered by that though. ]
Hmm. Is it my turn now?
[ ... ]
When I was younger I got recruited to sing in a local opera company. Completely lucky break, I ended up being one of those "discovered" talents, you know the kind that have the one in a lifetime moment where the right person happens to overhear them singing at just the right time? I ended up travelling all across Fodlan, performing in some of the best and biggest concert halls around, before I gave it all up to join the military instead.
[ damn. gu yun's had a lot of shots by now, though he takes his gamely, snickering anyway at molly's joke, even if he was the one to guess wrong! he loosens the jello with his tongue this time, and then slurps down another shot.
...
while this is happening, he listens to yuri, and then, slaps his hand against his knee, crumpling the jello plastic. ] Bullshit! Bullllshit.
that’s fine. Also pointing at Yuri, sitting back on up his heels, tail swishing.]
Bullshit bullshit bullshit! Total bullshit! Who would ever give up the stage for the military! I’d rather they hang me for treason. I don’t want to live in a universe where that’s true.
[ i, becks, personally hope gu yun has banged more times here than either of them just for that. yuri on the other hand just snorts delicately into his new, unopened jello shot. ]
Seconded.
But again, we'll probably feel like asses if it's true!
Oh, I got distracted! Is it my turn again already? Let’s see. [He’s. Practically just laying down now, stretched out and comfortable and also. Pretty drunk. But that pleasant phase of drunk before you feel bad.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ even if he understood maybe half of the words in that sentence. it does sound like a fun time! ]
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Then he just takes a jello shot and downs it.]
Shit. I thought that was a rather good one. Alright. Who’s next? Yuri?
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[ hmmm. there's a pause while he apparently sorts through all the sordid and exciting tales of his life... or puts together an appropriate lie, who can say? ]
One of my... friends, I guess you could call her. She's a bit literal minded. Or just dense, depending on the time of day you ask me.
She went to the trouble of creating a spell from scratch to make boots taste like liquorice, just because I told her if she wanted a chance in hell of restoring her household back to nobility she should consider tonguing a few noble's boots in the process.
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gu yun listens to yuri's tale, as he goes, thoughtfully, and then waves the hand holding the sharpie. ]
I'm charmed by the insult, and I don't know a damned thing about magic, so I'll say it's true. Am I the only person in this entire place who thought magic was just a fairy tale? I'm starting to get self conscious.
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[As for Yuri’s story . . . ]
I would like it to be true, so I’ll let it live as well. Not bullshit.
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[ mm hmm hmmmmmmmm. ]
Constance is a very special lady. And yes, she did go to all the trouble of inventing completely new magic because she can't tell when someone's making fun of her.
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hmmm. gu yun's turn. he tilts his head, once, twice, thoughtful. let's see... ]
Not long before I came here, I was seeing to my post at the Western border of Great Liang, the Jade Gate, when word reached me that a bald, mute, and utterly rancid smelling monk took my ward and two of his friends away from the Marquis's manor in the capital. It seemed this villain wanted to spirit them away to Jiangnan, a city by the sea, for who knows what sort of nefarious reason.
Naturally, I wouldn't stand for it, so I left my post to my second in command, donned an Iron Eagle and flew the entire way across the country, from the border city to Jiangnan, a journey that should have taken a week, in three days, to ensure the monk's devious schemes wouldn't come to fruition.
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There’s quite a bit of detail! So either it’s a very well practiced lie you’ve told many times, or this one is real.
. . . Bullshit. Bullshit!
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[ BULLSHIT BULLSHIT. ]
What do we have to lose?
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[ SUCKAS ]
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[Knocking it back without much more complaint than that, though. He is. Absolutely starting to feel it now though, because he’d had (looks at fingers) 5? That’s probably fine, he got a high tolerance.]
Okay, my turn again.
When I was younger, I was kidnapped by a cult. I wandered a little too far from the troupe by myself and got a little too drunk at the wrong tavern, and when I woke up, they had dragged me away into the night. My blood has special properties, you see, that they’d use to commune with their god. Tiamat, the queen of dragons, but don’t say her name too loudly, alright? Lots of heads means lots of ears. They bled me, over and over. Never enough to kill me, mind, I was too valuable. Eventually I escaped when someone accidentally left a door open, and I was brave enough to make a break for it. Took me months to reunite with the Carnival, huge pain, honestly.
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he's picking up another one while molly is recounting his tale, and when he's done he lifts up the shot like he's cheers-ing him: ]
I'm going to feel like an ass if it's true [ your TRAUMA ] but I'm going to go with bullshit on that one.
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I'll say true. [ just to be contrary. ]
1/2
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Imagine if it was true! You’d have looked like such an asshole!
[Taking the shot.]
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Hmm. Is it my turn now?
[ ... ]
When I was younger I got recruited to sing in a local opera company. Completely lucky break, I ended up being one of those "discovered" talents, you know the kind that have the one in a lifetime moment where the right person happens to overhear them singing at just the right time? I ended up travelling all across Fodlan, performing in some of the best and biggest concert halls around, before I gave it all up to join the military instead.
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...
while this is happening, he listens to yuri, and then, slaps his hand against his knee, crumpling the jello plastic. ] Bullshit! Bullllshit.
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also drunk
that’s fine. Also pointing at Yuri, sitting back on up his heels, tail swishing.]
Bullshit bullshit bullshit! Total bullshit! Who would ever give up the stage for the military! I’d rather they hang me for treason. I don’t want to live in a universe where that’s true.
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It's bullshit. For me, at least. But I did take the story from someone else.
[ i'm glad they're all jello shot tipsy-and-drunk now. ]
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[ mostly because he's completely and utterly tone deaf.
with a raucous laugh, he scoops up another shot. his turn. ]
My nickname - the Flower of the Northwest - is actually because I was a prostitute first.
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Is there a creature bigger than a bu— Aurochshit.
[is this more of the assuming he’s virginal? Probably.]
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Seconded.
But again, we'll probably feel like asses if it's true!
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[ wink! he lifts his shotglass, completely shameless at being caught in this lie, and slurps down another shot.
also neither of you will ever know.........]
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[flirt,]
Oh, I got distracted! Is it my turn again already? Let’s see. [He’s. Practically just laying down now, stretched out and comfortable and also. Pretty drunk. But that pleasant phase of drunk before you feel bad.]
I only learned to speak two years ago.
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Hmm.
[ molly your reading.... ]
That's not the weirdest thing I've heard today, you know. I'd believe it.
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