[parts of that-- they definitely make him bristle. the accusation of lying to oneself. asking to understand. he's heard those before, and it seems it's not much better in someone else's memory.
the widened eyes in his hair, pupils narrowed more than usual, are a giveaway despite his apparent composed curiosity.]
Yowza. Sounds like they're pretty terrible company!
Does it … ? Watching him hurt my friends and storm off to try and end the world, while I’m pretty helpless to do anything but watch and commentate? Does that sound great to you?
Oh, mostly the one where you're a consciousness in the other guy's head? You're right, there's a lot to ask about here, but I think that's the one I'm most curious about.
Then, I think that's simple enough. Suppose I'm a bit of a splinter off the main block. Or a branch off the tree, when the tree was shattered into a thousand pieces and scattered around to try and make sure the tree couldn't come back.
So when I was killed, and he got brought back, I was still around. Part of him, in a way.
Doesn't sound as if making sure the tree couldn't come back worked out very well! Then again, sealing never lasts, either...
[a good effort, probably.]
I've seen that with a Cookie back home, but never quite like this. In their case the splinter has ended up with her own body... though there's really no telling what happens when one or the other dies.
It didn't, but we're rather stubborn, so I'm not surprised it didn't. That's how resurrection works-- Sometimes it just doesn't. If they don't want to come back, they won't.
[ but yeah, basically, sealing the evil never lasts. ]
Not as much as it sounds, if you ask me. Never mind the drawbacks, it's just more trouble than it's worth.
[there are just always going to be problems, so long as both exist independently.
speaking of things that are more trouble than they're worth, though- on this last day of memshare week i give to you cookie issues context. this is long i'm so sorry but you can skip over 1:21:36 to 1:25:24, and 1:25:59 to 1:30:15, or you can also just read this on the wiki here and start with the section titled "the choice is yours" to the end of the chapter.
...yeah so about guys who try to kill someone's friends in front of them,]
[ugh. he hates people seeing this one, he really does-- being deceived by pure vanilla, of all cookies, is one of the worst things that has ever happened to him.]
[a shake of his head, one hand reflexively lifting to rest on his soul jam.]
When I came here, it was with a sword through my guts and my consciousness trapped in a drab gray box-- courtesy of our own fellow Beast!-- and him and his other little hero friends on the other side of the war.
[his hand tightens.]
Either he gets what he wants here and, I presume, I go right back to that... or I get what I'm here for.
Think it's rarely ever too late for anything. You're here, aren't you? That's already a "what-if." The whole it's too late nonsense ... That's only the sort of thing people tell themselves so they don't have to do the work to make the "what-if" happen.
[ sorry he is just stubbornly arguing this, but it just mirrors a lot of what he's doing and it feels like a massive waste, if if it doesn't work out. if it all just goes to shit again. ]
I've come here, my consciousness trapped with nine outer gods who can't stop arguing with one another about hwo to best destroy the world, and my other self saying all that "it's too late" cockamamie, and I think that's a bunch of nonsense too.
I think he just doesn't want you to hurt people, or yourself. And the way he goes about it isn't perfect, but we can't expect the anyone else or the world to be perfect. Not without us trying. If you think people are always going to disappoint you, they will.
Don't know. I wouldn't argue with you if I thought you were an arsehole who couldn't make any other choice. I don't really think you're as terrible as you play yourself up to be. If you didn't want anything at all, if you just wanted to live in your world by yourself and have perfect control of everything, then why are you here?
Well, they've been doing their best to disappoint me so far! I don't know why I should expect any differently.
[that's just the easiest part to respond to, in the face of all of this.]
I'm here to finish what I started. [...] And if I didn't, then what? I abandon everything I've worked towards for the last several ages, and-- what, start over?
[he doesn't know how to do that, after millenia of focus on the one thing keeping him going.
...he also doesn't know how to admit that he doesn't know.]
Not that easy a thing to throw away. Besides-- there's, you know, the entire Beast of Deceit business? That isn't simply what I do, it's sort of what I am!
[a little shrug, waving one hand.]
They already extracted and purified out the parts of our power that were "salvageable". [with physical air quotes.] That's what Vanilla has now. Me? Juuust the corrupted parts.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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the widened eyes in his hair, pupils narrowed more than usual, are a giveaway despite his apparent composed curiosity.]
Yowza. Sounds like they're pretty terrible company!
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[ or, they don't care. so they don't mess with molly, while he's busy being an annoying consciousness. ]
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[getting to be an annoying consciousness without those nine going for him...]
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[ he doesn’t think it’s awesome. ]
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[that part is definitely not awesome, no.]
How did you get into that situation in the first place?
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[ theres a lot of situations happening, to be honest. ]
Most of it wasn't anything I did. More the other guy's choices. And reading the wrong books.
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So when I was killed, and he got brought back, I was still around. Part of him, in a way.
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[a good effort, probably.]
I've seen that with a Cookie back home, but never quite like this. In their case the splinter has ended up with her own body... though there's really no telling what happens when one or the other dies.
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[ but yeah, basically, sealing the evil never lasts. ]
And how'd she end up with her own body?
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[one soul fragmented in two bodies, rather than multiple fragments in one body.]
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Well that's convenient for them.
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[there are just always going to be problems, so long as both exist independently.
speaking of things that are more trouble than they're worth, though- on this last day of memshare week i give to you cookie issues context. this is long i'm so sorry but you can skip over 1:21:36 to 1:25:24, and 1:25:59 to 1:30:15, or you can also just read this on the wiki here and start with the section titled "the choice is yours" to the end of the chapter.
...yeah so about guys who try to kill someone's friends in front of them,]
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Kind of seems like you got your ass kicked.
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Yes, well, it didn't stick.
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[ like. it's clear he's lonely. what if he just chose not to be. ]
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[not after what he'd said, before it happened.]
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[ like. where you had all his friends captive and were trying to steal his soul essence. ]
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[he is eternally mad about that part, definitely.]
But he's far from the only one.
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[ what if? what if? ]
What if you listened to what he actually said, and believed him?
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[a shake of his head, one hand reflexively lifting to rest on his soul jam.]
When I came here, it was with a sword through my guts and my consciousness trapped in a drab gray box-- courtesy of our own fellow Beast!-- and him and his other little hero friends on the other side of the war.
[his hand tightens.]
Either he gets what he wants here and, I presume, I go right back to that... or I get what I'm here for.
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[ sorry he is just stubbornly arguing this, but it just mirrors a lot of what he's doing and it feels like a massive waste, if if it doesn't work out. if it all just goes to shit again. ]
I've come here, my consciousness trapped with nine outer gods who can't stop arguing with one another about hwo to best destroy the world, and my other self saying all that "it's too late" cockamamie, and I think that's a bunch of nonsense too.
I think he just doesn't want you to hurt people, or yourself. And the way he goes about it isn't perfect, but we can't expect the anyone else or the world to be perfect. Not without us trying. If you think people are always going to disappoint you, they will.
Don't know. I wouldn't argue with you if I thought you were an arsehole who couldn't make any other choice. I don't really think you're as terrible as you play yourself up to be. If you didn't want anything at all, if you just wanted to live in your world by yourself and have perfect control of everything, then why are you here?
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[that's just the easiest part to respond to, in the face of all of this.]
I'm here to finish what I started. [...] And if I didn't, then what? I abandon everything I've worked towards for the last several ages, and-- what, start over?
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[ sounds kind of nice, though, doesn't it? ]
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...he also doesn't know how to admit that he doesn't know.]
Not that easy a thing to throw away. Besides-- there's, you know, the entire Beast of Deceit business? That isn't simply what I do, it's sort of what I am!
[a little shrug, waving one hand.]
They already extracted and purified out the parts of our power that were "salvageable". [with physical air quotes.] That's what Vanilla has now. Me? Juuust the corrupted parts.
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