[Are you ready to talk about this couch crime ....................
Anyway, tossing the nasty scarf off somewhere, just going to sit on the other side of him. Letting Beau blot him like a wine-stained rug. Probably too much for like two people to try and do this at once so, he'll keep his hands to himself.]
Great. Love hearing that something probably used my face to fuck with you. [that's what she's taking from this, at least.] I can punch you in the arm, that might convince you.
[Also making a sour face? He doesn't care for that either. Also LOL for various reasons.]
I feel as if Beauregard's offer to punch you when you're standing outside the Raven Queen's door and starting to knock is one that should convince you she's quite real as always.
[HE MIGHT DIE IF YOU HIT HIM TOO HARD BEAU HE'S A WIZARD WITH FOUR HP RIGHT NOW.]
... I've got no idea how to convince you actually. I solemnly swear I'm real.
The fake one punched me, too, so bad example. But then she tried to magic battle me.
[That's seven HP to you.
Anyway, his voice - which up until now has been pretty guarded and distant, actually sounds derisive when he says that; maybe just saying it out loud brought him further up from ninety percent, as well as the reminder of Beau trying to use a magic weapon against him instead of just punching him a lot.]
. . . It never convinced me, I knew to expect illusions. But my advice to you would be, if you wind up in that place and someone with my face starts trying very hard to hurt your feelings, play along with it. Tell it I made you sad. I got stubborn about it and that's why they started pulling out all the stops.
[she really is not a fan of that! at all! haha! anyway she doesn't punch him but he'd be fine if she did, what a baby. the only important hit point is the last one.
she pauses in cleaning him up, just for a second.]
... What slit your throat? [please do not say it was her or she will die]
But no hard feelings there, I set him on fire. [. . .] The part with you was just. . . idiotic. Everything kept trying to force me to go talk to her even though I knew it was an illusion, and then a big effort to try and convince me for a while by playing nice, saying I also saw Mollymauk around so let's go find him. Still didn't work, and then a lot of nasty things were said, still didn't work, so instead we start resorting to cheap tricks.
Eventually they pulled it off and I lost the plot on what was real or not for a bit, but it wasn't because they did a good job.
[MYSTERY CYOA RUNNER actually did a great job, but he's just going to try to bitterly criticize these efforts.]
Uhm. How to put this. . . I'm a little crazy, so if you're trying to fuck with my head there are ways to cheat.
[Sometimes you're the one who's stubborn about it being an illusion but there are also two million ways to trigger you. Anyway.]
I saw you there, but from a ways away, we were supposed to go find you. [Raising an eyebrow like is this important.]
Uhm. . . I was first, sort of, but I didn't start the fight. It was complicated. He didn't mean for it to be as serious as it was, at least I don't think.
[mystery cyoa runner like "i have ways to deal with caleb"]
Was there any sort of theme to it or was it just running around trying to find people? [caleb is clean enough now, but beau is going to insist he change clothes later, at the very least. fussing!!!]
You know how everything he says about the place he's from sounds bad but also makes no sense? Like that. We got magical microphones and if you said things into them you could hurt people. It was stupid.
[Grimacing. Okay, here's where it gets. More stupid.]
Well. At first, it was - we got separated, and that's where "Beauregard" came and tried to yell into her mic at me instead of punching. I'm not sure what was supposed to happen with that, but. . . her eyes kept turning black, which was sort of a theme. I wondered if it was maybe. . . some sort of bigger clue.
But after that it was, uhm. Hostages. People that we knew. So for me, Veth. [A glance at Molly.] Uhm, Nott. For Byleth it was her father. . . he died, I think, and they were offering to let her save him. I'm not so sure for Dimitri and Rupert, because Byleth and I were on a team and they were on a team.
But we had to do the uhm - the battles, like Ichiro does. Somehow we all sort of knew how to? And then the things we said turned into spells. So Dimitri's song mentioned wanting to cut out my throat. . .
[Imagine me writing all these angst tags and sitting on the fact that these are rap battle injuries. God.]
beau looks a little upset at the idea of veth being a hostage, but - it wasn't real. she's not actually here. it's... fine. she also absently rubs at her eye.]
Fuck. [she says, after a moment.] And yours had something to do with fire, I assume.
[I really struggled picking an icon for this because there's no ???????? emotion strong enough. Anyway really embarrassing for you Caleb that you let Dimitri of all people defeat you in rap battle.]
Byleth. . . [He seems to be considering what to say, but he trusts these two.] It hit her harder. She wanted to save her father, and I didn't. . . [He's not the guy who can tell you your crazy plan to resurrect your dead parents is a bad idea.]
When we saw how much damage it was doing, I think Dimitri and I started to . . . but Rupert first, he used his turn to heal me. I think that's when it turned around. I'd be dead except for that, and we decided to stop, but Byleth was, uhm, very determined to get to our hostages. We turned all our efforts to stopping the person who was running things. More eyes turning to black and creepy illusions.
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What -- [she starts, and then stops. no, try again.] Are you ready to talk about what happened?
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Anyway, tossing the nasty scarf off somewhere, just going to sit on the other side of him. Letting Beau blot him like a wine-stained rug. Probably too much for like two people to try and do this at once so, he'll keep his hands to himself.]
Don't have to be.
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That's not - that's not the issue.
[Whatever that means.]
I'm still not entirely convinced either of you are real. Ninety percent. A high number.
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Great. Love hearing that something probably used my face to fuck with you. [that's what she's taking from this, at least.] I can punch you in the arm, that might convince you.
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I feel as if Beauregard's offer to punch you when you're standing outside the Raven Queen's door and starting to knock is one that should convince you she's quite real as always.
[HE MIGHT DIE IF YOU HIT HIM TOO HARD BEAU HE'S A WIZARD WITH FOUR HP RIGHT NOW.]
... I've got no idea how to convince you actually. I solemnly swear I'm real.
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[That's seven HP to you.
Anyway, his voice - which up until now has been pretty guarded and distant, actually sounds derisive when he says that; maybe just saying it out loud brought him further up from ninety percent, as well as the reminder of Beau trying to use a magic weapon against him instead of just punching him a lot.]
. . . It never convinced me, I knew to expect illusions. But my advice to you would be, if you wind up in that place and someone with my face starts trying very hard to hurt your feelings, play along with it. Tell it I made you sad. I got stubborn about it and that's why they started pulling out all the stops.
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she pauses in cleaning him up, just for a second.]
... What slit your throat? [please do not say it was her or she will die]
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[But he kind of wants to know the answer to this one.]
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[So, no. It wasn't like that.]
But no hard feelings there, I set him on fire. [. . .] The part with you was just. . . idiotic. Everything kept trying to force me to go talk to her even though I knew it was an illusion, and then a big effort to try and convince me for a while by playing nice, saying I also saw Mollymauk around so let's go find him. Still didn't work, and then a lot of nasty things were said, still didn't work, so instead we start resorting to cheap tricks.
Eventually they pulled it off and I lost the plot on what was real or not for a bit, but it wasn't because they did a good job.
[MYSTERY CYOA RUNNER actually did a great job, but he's just going to try to bitterly criticize these efforts.]
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... Well, I guess it's good they can't completely play us. [she mutters.] What do you mean, it wasn't because they did a good job?
[she's also like, watching him a little more closely now.]
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I was there or I wasn't? Was as in fake-was, I suppose.
[Hrmgh.]
Set him on fire before or after he cut your throat? I don't really care, just ... [Is Dimitri gonna be mad.]
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[Sometimes you're the one who's stubborn about it being an illusion but there are also two million ways to trigger you. Anyway.]
I saw you there, but from a ways away, we were supposed to go find you. [Raising an eyebrow like is this important.]
Uhm. . . I was first, sort of, but I didn't start the fight. It was complicated. He didn't mean for it to be as serious as it was, at least I don't think.
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Was there any sort of theme to it or was it just running around trying to find people? [caleb is clean enough now, but beau is going to insist he change clothes later, at the very least. fussing!!!]
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Anyway, reaching over to sort of. Pick at Caleb's coat.]
You should change. [This is not a suggestion.] And maybe start at the beginning.
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[No, he's not making much sense, just picking out the parts he's pissed at.]
. . . I think it was Ichiro's memories?
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[...]
What?
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[...]
What?
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You know how everything he says about the place he's from sounds bad but also makes no sense? Like that. We got magical microphones and if you said things into them you could hurt people. It was stupid.
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That... sounds stupid. Okay, but like, how did you guys manage to hurt each other, were you testing the mics or something?
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You're going to have to keep going, I'm afraid.
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Well. At first, it was - we got separated, and that's where "Beauregard" came and tried to yell into her mic at me instead of punching. I'm not sure what was supposed to happen with that, but. . . her eyes kept turning black, which was sort of a theme. I wondered if it was maybe. . . some sort of bigger clue.
But after that it was, uhm. Hostages. People that we knew. So for me, Veth. [A glance at Molly.] Uhm, Nott. For Byleth it was her father. . . he died, I think, and they were offering to let her save him. I'm not so sure for Dimitri and Rupert, because Byleth and I were on a team and they were on a team.
But we had to do the uhm - the battles, like Ichiro does. Somehow we all sort of knew how to? And then the things we said turned into spells. So Dimitri's song mentioned wanting to cut out my throat. . .
[Imagine me writing all these angst tags and sitting on the fact that these are rap battle injuries. God.]
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beau looks a little upset at the idea of veth being a hostage, but - it wasn't real. she's not actually here. it's... fine. she also absently rubs at her eye.]
Fuck. [she says, after a moment.] And yours had something to do with fire, I assume.
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Fuck.
[...]
I assume that didn't turn out well for anyone?
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Byleth. . . [He seems to be considering what to say, but he trusts these two.] It hit her harder. She wanted to save her father, and I didn't. . . [He's not the guy who can tell you your crazy plan to resurrect your dead parents is a bad idea.]
When we saw how much damage it was doing, I think Dimitri and I started to . . . but Rupert first, he used his turn to heal me. I think that's when it turned around. I'd be dead except for that, and we decided to stop, but Byleth was, uhm, very determined to get to our hostages. We turned all our efforts to stopping the person who was running things. More eyes turning to black and creepy illusions.
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she pulls her knees to her chest as she listens.]
Rupert is a good dude. [...] You managed to stop it?
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