he does! thankfully for everyone involved. he's surprised, half out of the action itself and half out of the fact that it happens, dark eyes going wide in surprise.
...but, a second later, they slide shut, and he returns it. he can't hold onto molly; the fingers of his good hand come up to curl in the front of his open shirt, then slide away a second later. he makes a noise, frustrated, and reaches for the back of his neck, instead, fingers holding there for as long as he can physically make them.
and, he can feel that. the worry, the intensity of it, nearly smacks into him like a wave. gu yun's impenetrable, for most things, but that makes him want to just - ]
... Sorry. [ he says, finally, pulling away barely a half centimeter to say so. a real, genuine apology. ]
[if gu yun can't hold onto him, he'll just hold onto gu yun, then. hands still tightly at his collar, forehead still leaned against his - red eyes searching his face.]
Don't apologize? Why are you apologizing. Because I yelled at you? Probably because I was yelling at you-- don't. I'm full of shit. It isn't your fault. Or it likely is, because I know you, but I still don't want to hear that.
...for worrying you. [ his eyes flick up, and - he can't see much of molly up this close, even if his eyes are working perfectly fine, today, but, it's almost grounding. ]
...I've done a lot of that, this week. [ worrying you.
gu yun's not really someone used to being worried over. there's never really been anyone - or any reason. he's long prided himself on being infallible, consistently standing up no matter what seems to happen. no one besides ji ping is ever even close enough to him to see anything close to the reality of some of his life, of some of his injuries, the things he sustains. he refuses to give anyone even a second to doubt him into vulnerability.
but molly doesn't know him like shen yi knows him, and - and he worries, anyway. he knows the parts of gu yun that are vulnerable, because of the still raw share of their memories, of every other event that's happened over the past few days, and his opinion hasn't changed. it's a feeling gu yun is still settling into, and one he may be settling in to for a long time. ]
Oh. In that case, I expect flowers. Maybe some jewelry. Real apology gifts.
[there is something about just spilling all of your most fragile little memories right into someone's hands and expecting them to hold the blood in their cupped palms that really brings people together. of course gu yun is fallible. vulnerable. just a person like himself, a little beaten and battered on certain edges, but sharp steel on others. but he likes that person. he sees someone who wants to leave things better than he found them, too, a wish big enough for a whole nation, who still seems to care for the people here. of course, of course he worries.
molly himself hasn't stopped to consider any of the raw mix of emotions that just happened (have been happening?) for a single godsdamned second of his day. That would involve having to sit down with his thoughts somewhere and sort them the fuck out, and that isn't going to happen until he is forced at knifepoint. if he had, though, he might have a few warnings about getting settled anywhere for too long with a traveling carnie, a hedonist who follows the whims of a little ink on weathered cards, half a ghost already.]
[ that gets him to snort, a little. ] Sure. [ at least molly says what he wants?!?! every time he tried to apologize to chang geng for something with a present it went
very poorly
so, maybe this will be better? even if it's not, he's going to try to fumble through it anyway. gu yun doesn't really want to be the reason molly looks that pissed off and upset - he was upset, he was worried - and it feels wrong to try and use his silver tongue to get out of it. it feels...fake, almost, the sort of thing he'd do for anyone but maybe chang geng, which says a lot about the relationship he's built up with molly so far. so, his attempts at genuine emotion are fresh and new, and a little awkward, and molly's just going to have to deal with that (because for some strange reason, he seems to like him anyway?)
but again! these are a lot of emotions that he's also not going to think about any time soon. right now, he's putting that in a box, somewhere very far away, to psychoanalyze later how much it freaks him out to see molly that upset.
for now, he still can't hold on well enough; gu yun's useful hand slips away from molly's neck, falling into his lap. otherwise, he stays where he is, closing his eyes again. ] ...It wasn't completely my fault. [ also, ] But. Some of it likely could have been avoided. [ ok he'll admit that ] The thing we fought at the end was unlike anything I've ever seen, and it was getting stronger by the second. I bought us some time to figure out a solution.
[ sometimes you are a tank! except when you're not armored you're not really much of a tank. ]
[he is mostly joking but also he does love shiny things. molly just reaches to hold that useful hand himself, because, well, that's just a thing you do, isn't it? with all your friends? just worry about them to the point of rage and hold their hands constantly and ask them to top you? putting that in a box for later.
something gets very quickly shoved into that box he's trying to pack away that's along the lines of oh godsdammit he threw himself in the line of fire oh n but still that description makes his mouth turn into a tight line, shifting a little uncomfortably. that is a feeling he knows a bit too well, it seems. ]
[ what a convenient box for later that will never get unpacked! big same!! we're sure ignoring that right now, kind of like we're ignoring the fact that gu yun doesn't even think to push away having his hand held. he can't hold it back - his fingers curl, and then release - but he keeps it in molly's nonetheless. ]
Mm. [ comes his answer. this place is very dog eat dog, but ultimately, gu yun is the type of person who protects others, even if he doesn't necessarily seem that way on first glance. he'd barely had a second to decide what to do - but ultimately, he and childe had split into crisis mode the moment things got started. one going for what was likely the way out, and one going for the diversion.
he frowns, for a moment. his brow furrows. ] ...There was a goat. [ ... ??? ] That turned out to be the way out. The creature we were fighting wanted to keep us away from it, and was intent on killing us to do so.
We'd been given some sort of power. When Childe touched that goat, it took the power back - and we figured out we had to give it back to return. He threw it at me and I caught it [ we played tiny goat football ], and we went from there.
[molly hauls himself up to sit next to him, tail swishing while he absorbs . . . whatever all that meant?]
Feels a bit like you're trying to describe a bad trip the morning after. [As in, doesn't make much sense. But,] Anything to explain why you were there in the first place? Or did you at least get anything good?
This place seemed intent on me doing some sort of drug or another. It took "being attacked by dogs" to really send that message home.
[ HE AGREES!!!!! ] If it weren't for the fact that I'm physically reminded of everything that happened, I would've thought it just a horrid dream. [ considering the. you know. stump hand, and all of the injuries.
gu yun tilts his head to the last part, squinting a little. ] Besides the powers, no. I returned with a few trinkets, and I think I know who one of them may belong to - the second is a mystery. It's a little figure, of some sort of warrior.
I saw the-- [He doesn't know what it's called. Stick gesture? Making a kitty paw?] thing for cats that Vira brought back. Who do you think it belongs to?
gu yun glances across the way to wherever he'd set his things down. there's the steam lamp, on the top of the pile, the figurine leaning against it, but besides that is a wizard's hat. his brow furrows, a little, expression momentarily unreadable. ]
It's Wrath's. [ because he's seen it before, though not through his own eyes. ] ...I need to get it to her safely, as soon as possible.
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[ well!
he does! thankfully for everyone involved. he's surprised, half out of the action itself and half out of the fact that it happens, dark eyes going wide in surprise.
...but, a second later, they slide shut, and he returns it. he can't hold onto molly; the fingers of his good hand come up to curl in the front of his open shirt, then slide away a second later. he makes a noise, frustrated, and reaches for the back of his neck, instead, fingers holding there for as long as he can physically make them.
and, he can feel that. the worry, the intensity of it, nearly smacks into him like a wave. gu yun's impenetrable, for most things, but that makes him want to just - ]
... Sorry. [ he says, finally, pulling away barely a half centimeter to say so. a real, genuine apology. ]
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Don't apologize? Why are you apologizing. Because I yelled at you? Probably because I was yelling at you-- don't. I'm full of shit. It isn't your fault. Or it likely is, because I know you, but I still don't want to hear that.
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...for worrying you. [ his eyes flick up, and - he can't see much of molly up this close, even if his eyes are working perfectly fine, today, but, it's almost grounding. ]
...I've done a lot of that, this week. [ worrying you.
gu yun's not really someone used to being worried over. there's never really been anyone - or any reason. he's long prided himself on being infallible, consistently standing up no matter what seems to happen. no one besides ji ping is ever even close enough to him to see anything close to the reality of some of his life, of some of his injuries, the things he sustains. he refuses to give anyone even a second to doubt him into vulnerability.
but molly doesn't know him like shen yi knows him, and - and he worries, anyway. he knows the parts of gu yun that are vulnerable, because of the still raw share of their memories, of every other event that's happened over the past few days, and his opinion hasn't changed. it's a feeling gu yun is still settling into, and one he may be settling in to for a long time. ]
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[there is something about just spilling all of your most fragile little memories right into someone's hands and expecting them to hold the blood in their cupped palms that really brings people together. of course gu yun is fallible. vulnerable. just a person like himself, a little beaten and battered on certain edges, but sharp steel on others. but he likes that person. he sees someone who wants to leave things better than he found them, too, a wish big enough for a whole nation, who still seems to care for the people here. of course, of course he worries.
molly himself hasn't stopped to consider any of the raw mix of emotions that just happened (have been happening?) for a single godsdamned second of his day. That would involve having to sit down with his thoughts somewhere and sort them the fuck out, and that isn't going to happen until he is forced at knifepoint. if he had, though, he might have a few warnings about getting settled anywhere for too long with a traveling carnie, a hedonist who follows the whims of a little ink on weathered cards, half a ghost already.]
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very poorly
so, maybe this will be better? even if it's not, he's going to try to fumble through it anyway. gu yun doesn't really want to be the reason molly looks that pissed off and upset - he was upset, he was worried - and it feels wrong to try and use his silver tongue to get out of it. it feels...fake, almost, the sort of thing he'd do for anyone but maybe chang geng, which says a lot about the relationship he's built up with molly so far. so, his attempts at genuine emotion are fresh and new, and a little awkward, and molly's just going to have to deal with that (because for some strange reason, he seems to like him anyway?)
but again! these are a lot of emotions that he's also not going to think about any time soon. right now, he's putting that in a box, somewhere very far away, to psychoanalyze later how much it freaks him out to see molly that upset.
for now, he still can't hold on well enough; gu yun's useful hand slips away from molly's neck, falling into his lap. otherwise, he stays where he is, closing his eyes again. ] ...It wasn't completely my fault. [ also, ] But. Some of it likely could have been avoided. [ ok he'll admit that ] The thing we fought at the end was unlike anything I've ever seen, and it was getting stronger by the second. I bought us some time to figure out a solution.
[ sometimes you are a tank! except when you're not armored you're not really much of a tank. ]
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something gets very quickly shoved into that box he's trying to pack away that's along the lines of oh godsdammit he threw himself in the line of fire oh n but still that description makes his mouth turn into a tight line, shifting a little uncomfortably. that is a feeling he knows a bit too well, it seems. ]
I assume you did figure one out, yes?
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Mm. [ comes his answer. this place is very dog eat dog, but ultimately, gu yun is the type of person who protects others, even if he doesn't necessarily seem that way on first glance. he'd barely had a second to decide what to do - but ultimately, he and childe had split into crisis mode the moment things got started. one going for what was likely the way out, and one going for the diversion.
he frowns, for a moment. his brow furrows. ] ...There was a goat. [ ... ??? ] That turned out to be the way out. The creature we were fighting wanted to keep us away from it, and was intent on killing us to do so.
We'd been given some sort of power. When Childe touched that goat, it took the power back - and we figured out we had to give it back to return. He threw it at me and I caught it [ we played tiny goat football ], and we went from there.
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Feels a bit like you're trying to describe a bad trip the morning after. [As in, doesn't make much sense. But,] Anything to explain why you were there in the first place? Or did you at least get anything good?
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[ HE AGREES!!!!! ] If it weren't for the fact that I'm physically reminded of everything that happened, I would've thought it just a horrid dream. [ considering the. you know. stump hand, and all of the injuries.
gu yun tilts his head to the last part, squinting a little. ] Besides the powers, no. I returned with a few trinkets, and I think I know who one of them may belong to - the second is a mystery. It's a little figure, of some sort of warrior.
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Could it be for Gluttony? [ since, you know. cat! ]
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Oh. Yes. Likely. And the thing you've gotten?
[look, i personally know, but molly has not made the connection.]
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gu yun glances across the way to wherever he'd set his things down. there's the steam lamp, on the top of the pile, the figurine leaning against it, but besides that is a wizard's hat. his brow furrows, a little, expression momentarily unreadable. ]
It's Wrath's. [ because he's seen it before, though not through his own eyes. ] ...I need to get it to her safely, as soon as possible.
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[He-- squints at it a moment, but. Then just squeezes Gu Yun's hand.]
See that you do.
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[ all these people guilting him into actually taking care of himself!!! ]